SEO,
Google And Sex

By
Joel Leyden
Israel News Agency
Tel Aviv ----
October 21, 2009 ..... The following parody is a cute tale of
SEO, Google and sex which may have it creative origins in India.
A magical place where thousands are employed for only a few dollars
and whose mission is to attract both reader and search engine
using any means they can. These busy Indian optimizers use a variety
of legal spam methods, including employing the word sex to attract.
Sex is the number one searched word on the Net with over 582,000,000
pages coming up on Google.
Even The
New York Times has worked to ensure that its site and search
results are incredibly Google friendly, so Google friendly in
fact that a recent search for sex on Google currently
serves the NY Times internal archive search results for
sex as #2.
In the story below, notice how often the word sex is used, along
with the words Google and SEO. But what really made us smile in
writing and editing this story was how organized and creative
the writer was. He didn't just throw out some words hoping that
some literally trash would stick to the search engines. For it
remains the creative balance between good and interesting content
and the optimization of that content which makes today's Internet
Web and news author relevant.
SEO or search
engine optimization is a term widely used in Internet marketing.
It is quite useful for any Website in Israel, New York, London,
Paris, China or India for increasing traffic, sales and services.
It is crucial for any site to achieve its optimum ranking results
in Google, Yahoo and numbers of other search engines.
SEO is the
process of increasing the volume and traffic to a web site from
various search engines by increasing organically the search results
for targeted keywords. Usually, the earlier a site is presented
in the search results or the higher it ranks, the
more searchers will visit that site. SEO can also target different
kinds of search, including image search, local search, and industry-specific
vertical search engines.
Now, what is sex?
I think there is no need for the explanation of this term because
it is the most searched term on the Internet. Everyone knows about
sex and its importance for stability, sensation and satisfaction
in life. So, it is referred to as a basic need. In the same way
as SEO is critical for your site.
Why SEO and
sex is important? SEO is important for the instant growth of your
business. If you are not ranking well in the search engines then
it can help you in various ways. It will enhance your site traffic.
Traffic will increase your sales and services as you penetrate
the market.
If you rank
well, you may even establish a brand name in your specific market.
Sex is a sensation which is most important for a healthy, happy
and peaceful life. A greater satisfaction may increase your thinking
and coolness in life. If you enjoy healthy sex on a daily basis
then it can enhance many other aspects of your life.
For ultimate satisfaction, a healthy sex life is important. In
the same manner with SEO if you secure more organic traffic results
on Google then the greater will be your satisfaction.
With a more
natural and open approach as to your involvement in sex, the more
powerful the sensation. In the same perspective as when you get
a boom in business then naturally powerful results may fill you
with sensation.
There are
various similarities between SEO and sex.
But there are some differences which makes SEO better than sex.
Well friends, I am going through the alphabetical approach to
describe how SEO and sex is similar and dissimilar.
Both create
sensation. SEO and sex both create intimacy and boundless sensations.
SEO is a sensational thing for any Website and sex generates sensation
through physical intercourse. As I stated above - SEO brings traffic
to a site organically or naturally and sex creates sensation in
the orgasm and in the human body by a natural phenomenon.
Both are organic functions - although both can be paid for. But
please, do not confuse Google Adwords with prostitution. Although
both may be optimized through the use of keywords.
As traffic
increases for a site it brings new customers and increases business
for the company or organization behind the site. In a similar
way, as the climax during sex increases the pleasure increases.
So, traffic for a site may be simulated with the orgasmic climax
in sex.
Expertise
is needed. In both cases an expert may generate wonderful results.
An SEO expert can manage the site for Google and Yahoo rankings
well in the SERPs and secure increased traffic to the site. It
is the tactics based on extensive professional marketing knowledge,
social networking (Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, blogs), Web 2.0,
viral marketing, PR and the practice of the SEO expert by which
he or she can have a site ranked high in a very short time for
targeted traffic. A practice which can work quicker and stay stronger
than Viagra!
In a similar
way, an expert in sex can generate more pleasure than a new member.
He or she may know about the right sexual positions, time and
the procedure to follow which can increase organic results and
pleasurable sensation in the body.
Optimization
is critical. Here is where SEO differs from sex because the word
sex does not contain the letter O. SEO is the process
of optimizing search results by using the professional knowledge
of an SEO professional.
Professional
SEO services will increase the optimum results day by day. But
in the case of sex a human having more sex may lessen his or her
interest and stamina with time.
Then we have
the X - Factor. The X Factor refers to the indefinablesomething
that makes one thing better than other. SEO is the process of
making an Ordinary site into an eXtra
ordinary site so the X letter is silent in SEO in this way. So,
here is the difference or X - factor which differs SEO from sex
and makes SEO more potent than sex.
Well friends,
SEO has an extra silent X which proves that it is better than
sex.
Now let's examine excessive linking in SEO and excess of sex.
Excessive means exceeding a normal, usual, reasonable, or
proper limit. Linking which means to become connected
with or as if with a HTML link.
Google released their guidelines on Link Scheme and below one
can find violations of Googles Webmaster blackhat practices
that can negatively impact your sites ranking in search
results.
One must be
wary of links intended to manipulate PageRank. Links to web spammers
or bad neighborhoods on the web. Excessive reciprocal links or
excessive link exchanging such as "link to me and Ill
link to you." Buying or selling links that pass PageRank
are also forbidden.
Excessive
linking may harm your site SEO Google search results and authority.
When you link excessively the search engines will stop counting
them when evaluating your authority.
Now in the
case of sex the result is the same.
Excess sex may be harmful to your health. Some health care providers
say that excess of sexual activity can put an extra strain on
your heart, especially if your heart is already weak from a heart
attack or heart disease. There is an exception to this rule when
it comes to prostate cancer where recent research indicates that
daily sex and or masturbation
may actually reduce incidence of this cancer by up to one third.
And that daily sex for females may actually act as a catalyst
for them to perform more domestic
chores. Please do not slay the messenger here for these recent
news developments.
Now for our
professional assessment of the effect of no SEO and no sex.
If a site owner has no SEO then he may loose an opportunity to
increase his or her business. And the site and owner may worry
about other tactics which may be far more expensive for him or
her. And he or she may go for paid or sponsored referrals such
as Google Adwords - or sponsored links. And he or she may loose
the opportunity to secure customers naturally.
| These
men are optimized but not for the Internet. The INA
cautions all males athletes from taking part in sex before
participating in sports. This is due to endorphins being released
from the male's brain during sex. Research does indicate that
endorphins have little or no affect on SEO, social networking,
Web 2.0 or Internet marketing practices. |
In the same
way in the case of no sex the life of a human being may become
random and full of dissatisfaction. We only recommend no sex activity
in sports for male athletes about to set Olympic records in track
and field, basketball, football, soccer, tennis, skiing, baseball,
cricket, swimming, hockey and shooting. Sex is a basic need so
its fulfillment is necessary for a healthy and peaceful life.
The concept for the above news story was found on the Web from
SEO experts in India. We from the Israel News Agency spent
hours correcting grammatical mistakes but must give credit to
our busy friends in India for their unending, relentless enthusiasm
and non-verbal Web creativity.
If you care for more information on SEO or sex, you may check
out the following websites: Israel
Pr.com (English), Israel
SEO Pr.com (Hebrew) or New
York SEO Pr. Or you can take a relaxing and sensual trip with
us to India in the near future!
Internet
Marketing SEO Professionals ask:
Can
People Find Your Website?

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